When Bill O'Reilly is not being sued for sexual harassment by his female employees and when he’s not inviting terrorists to come and blow up major American cities and when he’s not lecturing former POW’s on the “effectiveness” of torture and when he’s not making not-so-veiled “lynching party” threats against the wife of a prominent Senator/Democratic Presidential hopeful of African-American descent and when he’s not making racial epithets against a Harlem restaurant and its clientele and when he’s not venomously attacking a grieving mother who’s lost her son to a war that he so orgasmically supports and when he’s not getting into pissing contests with celebrities over their charity work and when he’s not threatening the livelihood of some celebrity who he claims to be a “subversive influence” on children with one of his many insipid boycotts and when he’s not encouraging his superiors to file these absurdly frivolous lawsuits against those he don’t like and when he’s not belittling homeless Vets on his show, Bill O is finding new ways to make an A-Hole of himself. For instance, I saw the former illustrious Inside Edition host on Oprah Winfrey’s show back in October of 2006 touting his latest political tome shamelessly-titled Culture Warrior. In the book, and on Oprah’s show, Bill argued how (my paraphrasing) “moral relativism” was ruinous to our “culture” and our country. However, in Bill O’s first book the appropriately-titled The O’Reilly Factor, which is, of course, the name of his insipid show on Fox (Non) News, here is what Bill himself had to say—on pages 32 & 33, to be exact—on the subject of “culture” and how he felt that Americans—including, apparently, himself—should respond to it: “[T]he constant sex of TV and movies doesn’t get me all worked up about declining values and ready to mount a moral high horse. As advertisers know, they are giving us what we want. Those who are really upset are definitely in the minority; those who pretend to be upset are downright phonies. Both groups are perfectly free to change the channel to PBS, C-Span, or whatever—or read a book!” And here’s a quote taken from Bill O’s Playboy Interview published in their May 2002 issue when Bill was asked if he was “self-conscious” when he wrote the—and, no, I’m not making this up!—sex scenes for his novel Those Who Trespass (which, believe it or not, included one with a 15-year-old girl; so much for NOT engaging in "moral relativism," huh?) and is a quote I feel is pretty self-explanatory: “No, I’m a pretty uninhibited guy. It doesn’t seem that way, because I compartmentalize. My social life doesn’t have anything to do with my news career. I don’t blend the two.” As for what Mr. O’Reilly espouses on his show, during the September 23rd, 2003 broadcast of The O’Reilly Factor, B.S. Bill, after kindly referring to his archenemy Al "Rush Limbaugh Is A Big Fat Idiot" Franken as a “vicious” commentator, railed against those—i.e. “liberals”—who “poisoned civil debate” in this country and vowed to expose those who set out to “destroy” others reputations. On page 184 of his book The O’Reilly Factor, Bill kindly compares Rosie O’Donnell to Nazi propagandist Joseph Goebbels (so much for not “poisoning civil debate,” huh?). Also in his book, B.S. Bill decrees the following—on page 48, to be exact—regarding the Gulf of Tonkin incident which, for those of you out there needing a history lesson, became the catalyst for America’s “war” in Vietnam: “Tell me I’m arrogant, but I know that this cock-and-bull story would not get by me on today’s The O’Reilly Factor—or on other cable shows and Internet magazines. There are too many of us today who are not paid lackeys of the establishment. And more than one of us would be on the ground within hours, getting the real story from the guys on both ships.” Now, the million-dollar question is, just where in the blessed hell was all of this fearless journalism when President Bush was making his unsubstantiated claims about so-called weapons of mass destruction which, of course, became the catalyst for his own ill-fated “war” in Iraq? Well, Bill? Countless times on his show, Bill has lamented about his lack of book reviews in the much-hallowed New York Times (even though every one of his insipid books have inexplicably made it onto the much-hallowed New York Times bestseller lists). Well, in recognition of his lack of book reviews in the NYT, here's a possible review the NYT could have printed: "A Bold Fresh Piece Of Humanity? Well, it's 'a bold fresh piece' of something!" Lastly, Bill O'Reilly wrote a, uh-hum, historical account of Abraham Lincoln's assassination titled Killing Lincoln that was reportedly, and I say "reportedly" since I have yet to read the damn thing, rife with SO many historical and/or factual errors that the book/movie Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter is probably more historically and/or factually accurate! Oh yeah, before I forget, Bill O'Reilly actually wrote a book aimed at children titled, appropriately-enough, The O'Reilly Factor For Kids. Can anyone say irony? A sidenote: Bill O'Reilly reportedly had the higher-ups at Fox (Non) News sue his nemesis Al Franken over his "Lying Liars" book because he reportedly "objected" to his picture on the cover, which, for anyone who has seen it, it's admittedly NOT a very flattering picture of Bill O. Anyway, a federal judge literally laughed this admittedly ridiculous lawsuit right out of his court, saying it was "wholly without merit," which, as some have surmised, ought to be the new "slogan" of Fox (Non) News!
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